Wearing a Kittel on Yom Kippur

Question: I got married a few months ago and plan on wearing my kittel on Yom Kippur. My father said that it is our minhag and that he has done so every year since he got married, but my friends have said that I should not wear it during the first year. What should I do?

Answer: The Talmud Yerushalmi (Rosh Hashana 1:3) teaches that we wear white to demonstrate our confidence that we will be forgiven for our sins (see Aruch Hashulchan OC 581:13). The acharonim suggest additional reasons for the minhag to wear a kittel on Yom Kippur (and seder night). The Taz (OC 472:3) writes that since men are buried in their kittel, wearing it reminds them to be humble and remorseful. The Rema (OC 610:4) adds that we wear white to be like malachim, angels, representing purity and innocence.

The Taamei Haminhagim (Kuntres Acharon 503) writes that due to the sombre symbolism of the kittel, men who have recently married should not wear one, though aveilim (mourners) should. The Maharam Schick (OC 28) notes that in some communities, the custom is for men not to wear a kittel until after their first year of marriage. He clarifies that this mainly applies to chassanim who get married before they are twenty. However, he also notes that there is no mekor for this custom and that one should not prevent newlywed men from wearing one (see Mateh Ephraim, Elef Hamagen 619:11).

Similarly, the Shearim Metzuyanim Behalacha (131:22) and Piskei Teshuvos (610:3) cite several poskim who argue that men should wear a kittel even within their first year of marriage (see Yad Yitzchak 3:202:4). The Aruch Hashulchan (OC 610:2) emphasises that the Rema’s reason is the primary reason, and the kittel is fundamentally a ‘garment of honour’. R’ Moshe Feinstein (Igros Moshe YD 4:61:7) also notes that the symbolism of a kittel as shrouds is largely lost on people today. Instead, it is primarily considered a joyful garment, as we are likened to malachim. Presumably, these poskim would allow newlywed men to wear one.

In conclusion, unless one has a specific minhag not to wear a kittel during their first year, it seems that married men may wear a kittel when davening on Yom Kippur and on seder night.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Beracha on Tasting Food

Question: I frequently taste food while cooking. Should I recite a beracha? Answer: Rambam (Berachos 1:2) states that one is not required to recite a beracha before tasting food. However, Rabbeinu Chananel (quoted by Tosefos, Berachos 14a) holds that one must recite a beracha , unless they spit the food out (see Tur OC 210:2). The Shulchan Aruch (OC 210:2) rules that if one tastes less than a revi’is of food and spits it out, they do not need to say a beracha . There is, however, a difference of opinion as to whether a beracha should be recited if the food is swallowed. The Mishna Berura (210:19) explains that the Shulchan Aruch follows the opinion of Rambam, meaning that one would not recite a beracha regardless of whether the food is swallowed. The Rema adds that safek berachos lekula , in cases of doubt as to whether a beracha is necessary, the lenient approach is followed, as most berachos are derabanan . However, the Mishna Berura (ibid., Shaar Hatziyun 210:30) notes...
Read more

Wait Until Nacht to Count the Omer

Question: When is the best time to count the omer if I am not davening maariv with a minyan at nacht ? Answer: The Beis Yosef (OC 489:1) highlights a machlokes regarding whether one may count the omer during bein hashemashos (the time between shekia , sunset, and nacht , nightfall). The Rosh, (Pesachim 10:40), Tur (OC 489:1) and Tosafos (Menachos 66a) argue that since counting the omer is miderabanan nowadays, it is permissible to count from shekia . On the other hand, Rambam (Temidin Umusafin 7:22) and the Ran (Pesachim 28a) assert that one should wait until nacht . Following this reasoning, the Mishna Berura (489:14) states that, ideally, one should wait until nacht to count (see Aruch Hashulchan OC 489:7). Other poskim , including the Bach (OC 489:1), Shulchan Aruch Harav (OC 489:12) and R’ Ovadia Yosef (Yechave Daas 1:23) write that it is acceptable to count after shekia . The Shulchan Aruch (OC 489:1) advises that the omer should be counted after maariv . The Mishna Beru...
Read more

Concluding Chazaras Hashatz

Question: I often see the chazzan take three steps back and forward after finishing his chazaras hashatz . Is this necessary? Answer: The Gemara (Yoma 53b) teaches that one should take three steps back upon completing the amida . The Shulchan Aruch (OC 123:1) explains that this is done by turning first to the left, then to the right, and finally bowing forward while reciting ‘oseh shalom..’. This gesture is compared to a servant taking leave of their master. The Beis Yosef (OC 123:1) provides several explanations for this practice. Quoting the Shibolei Haleket (18), he notes that stepping backward symbolises leaving the sacred space of prayer and re-entering the mundane world. The Shulchan Aruch (OC 123:4) rules that the chazzan should only take three steps back after completing his silent amida , not after chazaras hashatz . However, the Rema adds that if the chazzan has not yet recited his own silent amida , he is required to take three steps back after chazaras hashatz ....
Read more