A Touchy Topic
Question: At a recent business meeting, a lady proffered her hand for a handshake. Was I allowed to shake it? Answer: The question of whether it is okay for a non related man and woman to shake hands largely depends on whether this contact is classified as a דרך תאוה וחיבה , a ‘way that is based on attraction’. Lenient authorities have quoted the Shach (YD 195:20), who, quoting Rambam, writes that it is (only) forbidden for a man and woman to touch in any manner that causes attraction ( chiba ). Where touching yields no pleasure, it would be permissible (YD 157:10). Thus, R’ Moshe Feinstein paskens (Igros Moshe EH 2:14) that one can sit on a tram next to a woman even if they are accidentally touching. R’ Chaim Berlin (Nishmas Chaim, EH) writes that today, shaking hands is a regular way of greeting people. One has to bear in mind what reputation such a refusal will leave Religious Jews with. Rather shake hands than give others the impression that we’re crazy and are lackin...