Question: We’ve been invited by some
friends to Friday night dinner. Where should we light our Shabbos candles?
Answer: The Shulchan Aruch (OC 263:9)
writes that one who lights their candles inside their house but eats in the
courtyard needs to ensure that their candles burn longer so that they can see
them when they come back inside. Failure to do so will result in the beracha
being a beracha levatala. The Mishna Berura (263:40) writes that while
it is ideal for the candles to burn into the night, it is sufficient even if
they burn during his meal when one eats before nacht (See Baer Heitev
263:14).
The Shulchan Aruch (OC 263:6) writes that students who
learn away from home should ideally light their Shabbos candles in their
bedrooms. Thus, the Mishna Berura (263:46) writes that while the hosts should
light on the Shabbos table, guests should ideally light in their own room even
if they aren’t eating there at all.
Following this, R’ Ephraim Greenblatt (Rivevos Ephraim
1:183) writes that one eating out though sleeping at home should ideally light
at their own house. It is ideal if they can leave the candles burning until
they come home, though if necessary they can stay with them for a few minutes
before they go out (See Minchas Yitzchak 10:20).
Likewise, R’ Yehoshua Neuwirth (Shemiras Shabbos Kehilchasa
45:8) writes that while children who visit their parents for Friday night
dinner often light together with their parents, they should ideally light in
their own houses.
If lighting at one’s house isn’t an option, then one can
light in their host’s house. Even though their host has lit candles one can
still light with a beracha as they are adding to the light (Mishna
Berura 263:35).
In conclusion, it is preferable to light where one sleeps
on Friday night, rather than where one eats.
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