Question: I haven’t seen some of my close friends
for a few months due to lockdown. Should we say a beracha when we meet
or does the fact that we have spoken over the phone and via Zoom mean that we
don’t need to?
Answer: The Gemara (Berachos 58a) teaches that one
who sees their friend after an absence of thirty days recites the beracha
of shehecheyanu, and if after a year, they recite the beracha of mechaye
hameisim. The Shulchan Aruch (OC 225:1) adds that this only applies to
particularly close friends who one is most excited to see.
Thus, R’ Ovadia Yosef (Yechave Daas 4:17) writes that if
one is excited about seeing their close friends or family after a prolonged
absence, one recites shehecheyanu.
Nonetheless, many poskim limit this, writing that
it does not apply to typical situations nowadays. Thus, the Eshel Avraham
(230:4) and Ben Ish Chai (Ekev 1:14) write that we are not particular about
this beracha and one should rather recite this beracha without shem
umalchus (Hashem’s name). R’ Yosef Yuzpa Han (Yosef Ometz 451) explains
that such friendships are few and far between.
R’ Shlomo Zalman Auerbach (Halichos Shlomo, Tefilla 23:12; n53) concurs, writing that one would only say it in rare circumstances such as if one had survived fighting in the front lines in battle, etc. When his daughter and son-in-law (and R’ Yaakov Kamenetsky) came to visit him in eretz Yisrael from abroad, he went out to buy a new fruit in order to be able to say shehecheyanu.
R’ Shlomo Zalman Auerbach (Halichos Shlomo, Tefilla 23:12; n53) concurs, writing that one would only say it in rare circumstances such as if one had survived fighting in the front lines in battle, etc. When his daughter and son-in-law (and R’ Yaakov Kamenetsky) came to visit him in eretz Yisrael from abroad, he went out to buy a new fruit in order to be able to say shehecheyanu.
R’ Nissan Karelitz (Chut Shani, Rosh Hashana, Kobetz
Inyanim 16) writes that if one had seen their friend over live video in the
meantime then this, too, would diminish the joy and prevent one from being able
to recite shehecheyanu.
In conclusion, one should not say shehecheyanu upon
seeing one’s friends after lockdown, especially if one has been in touch with
them in the meantime.
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