Question:
My husband usually gives mishloach manos and matanos laevyonim for
our family. Is that okay, or do I need to give my own, too?
Answer: Rambam (Megilla 2:15) and the
Shulchan Aruch (OC 695:4) write that everyone
must give two food items to another for mishloach
manos, and give charity to two poor people for matanos
laevyonim (Rambam, ibid. 16; Shulchan Aruch OC 694:1; Mishna Berura
694:1).
While the Rema (OC 695:4) writes that women have the same obligation
in mishloach manos and matanos laevyonim as men, the Mishna Berura (695:25) and Aruch Hashulchan
(OC 695:18) quote the Magen
Avraham (OC 695:14) who writes that many married women are not particular to
give their own mishloach manos and rely on their husband’s. He writes that ideally, married women
should give their own mishloach manos to their friends.
The Aruch Hashulchan (OC 694:2) writes that a husband can give matanos
laevyonim on behalf of himself and his wife. However, R’ Ephraim Greenblatt (Rivevos Ephraim
4:173:58) quotes R’ Yitzchak Yaakov Fuchs (Halichos Bas Yisrael, p303) who
writes that a husband giving on his wife’s behalf should ideally inform her
that he is doing so.
In conclusion, a couple can give matanos laevyonim together,
though they must be aware that the other has given on their behalf as they are
both required to give. Ideally, married women should give their own mishloach
manos and not rely on their husbands to give on their behalf.
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